in this day
in this time
on this plane of existence
it can be easy to forget who you are.
if you are not rich
if you are not attracted to the "right" gender
if you are not male
if you are not able bodied
if you are not white
...or even if you are
you do not always remember yourself.
i don't always remember myself.
one word, one glance, one gesture can erase the learning i've acquired over the years, negate my life experience and the gleam in my lovers' eyes.
i can, momentarily, become stupid, nappy headed black girl before i reclaim my rightful space as intelligent, naturally-minded woman.
in the inconvenience of having to bleed outside my moon lodge, i can see my keeper as a burden instead of a blessing.
not to mention all the stories, voices, visions and machinations i have to stop dead in their tracks in the course of a day.
it happens to all of us.
my reasons, my intentions, my goals and my dreams are often twisted and misinterpreted to my face, turned into caricatures of themselves by those too simple to understand them.
i do not always use your scholastic aptitude approved words because my ancestors knew that if you could explain the movement of the planets to a child, you could raise a nation that would last for centuries. obfuscation often proves nothing but intellectual selfishness.
i don't have to speak the english that was beaten into my ancestors' backs or rolled off their split tongues unless i'm speaking to their former masters. on my time, i choose the rhythms my mouth intuits. that's what i have left of the languages that have been lost.
my sight is far and wide, as it should be. i am not naive, soft, weak, confused or insane because i can communicate with the unseen realm. on the contrary, you who you refuse to vibrate in harmony with all your relations are the unbalanced ones.
i do not have to shout my recollection.
you do not have to believe me or live in my reality for me to know what is real.
you cannot shut me up
because you cannot stop my body from moving
because you cannot steal my smile
because you cannot still my hands
because you cannot stop my tears
because you cannot sell my mind
because you cannot keep me from my lover
because you cannot eat my spirit.
no matter what you say or do, i will remember.
and so will my people.