truth.

When you get tired enough, and you’re willing to sacrifice everything within yourself… The fear just leaves. 
~Erykah Badu

rapidly
approaching
this.

or maybe i'm already there...

{via}

i guess i paid the price for bein' free...

"lil' red boat"
angel grant

victory

lately, there have been many battles.

it's been a long time since i've been this weary.

it's also been a long time since i've felt this strong.

i am resting. building. learning. stretching.

even through tears.

i am the tiger's daughter,
newly named for a nubian lioness.

i know how to rest in the high grass

and wait.

but hunger is a compelling force.

when the time's right
i will pounce
and feast.

expect me.

elemental

i have a watery, sweet soul:
calm, cool, collected,
plenty of patience.

most are content to simply swim in the ocean...

but there's fire here, too.

an underwater volcano: quiet, but still active
contained only by the element surrounding me.

my worlds are created deeply, sometimes violently;
built from tsunamis, earthquakes, and lava spouts
seen only by the most skilled and adventurous divers.

a love to last...

working my way up to openly admitting {again} that i long to be loved--not just liked--has been an interesting journey.

even more interesting is that the letter was written almost two years ago to the day...the postscript almost a year ago.

i didn't know it'd been that long.

but, in the interest of continuing to acknowledge and manifest my desires...




I want a Sunday kind of love
A love to last past Saturday night
And I’d like to know it’s more than love at first sight
And I want a Sunday kind of love

I want a a love that’s on the square
Can’t seem to find somebody
Someone to care
And I’m on a lonely road that leads to nowhere
I need a Sunday kind of love

I do my Sunday dreaming,
And all my Sunday scheming
Every minute, every hour, every day

Oh I’m hoping to discover
A certain kind of lover
Who will show me the way

And my arms need someone
Someone to enfold
To keep me warm when Mondays and Tuesdays grow cold
Love for all my life to have and to hold
Oh and I want a Sunday kind of love

I don’t want a Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday, or Thursday, Friday or Saturday
Oh nothing but Sunday oh yea
I want a Sunday Sunday
I want a Sunday kind of love
Sunday, Sunday, Sunday kind of love

miscellaneous: classic pieces from a part-time poet

so, i finally did it. there's a collection of my stuff out there.

read, comment, and tell a friend or five.  

if you'd like to help support my various endeavors, please consider making a small donation.

why the cash?  well, i'm trying to complete my spiritual ordination, take a reiki master training course in the spring, and stock up on supplies necessary for my healing practice.  any money i can push towards those things is a great help, since most of the day job funds are tied up in bills/food/survival. 

you can send donations via paypal to raha.reiki [at] gmail.com.        

and, last but not least, thank you for all the wonderful comments and conversations over the last couple of years. looking forward to many, many more. 

happy reading!

temple woman's prayer

Mother of Mothers
Immaculate Heart
Blessed One

hear me now.

shield, guide and protect your daughter.
guide me to the path that will feed my heart and soul.

protect me from those who can only see my body and its pleasures,
who would expressly use my power as their own.

bring me true love and affection.
give me, grant me the power to heal in other dimensions,
and the express choice to determine when i do it intimately.

may I nor any other daughter be forced into this position again, ever.
and those in the profession be protected and respected.

remind me, Sweet Mother, that my body is Your instrument, Your vessel.

I may not love all, but I can be compassion-filled.
where my legs stay closed, may my heart remain appropriately open...

thank You
for my beauty
the sway of my hips
my shape
my sensuality
my flirtatious, wild nature.

I love who You've made me.

strengthen my mind, heart and spirit.
remove all shame and doubt.

what You have bestowed, let no one rend asunder.

Ase.

mother sky

i hear you.

velvet sky dotted with diamonds, whispering secrets.

i'd thought your daughters claimed me;
they must have already known
i was your namesake.

i think i am
what i've always been,
but you stretch me into your infinite space
and tell me i belong
there.

i hear you.

a new connection...

as i experienced this, i didn't realize this:

Xochiquetzal was honored at a festival every 8 years. A young woman was chosen by artisans to impersonate the goddess; she would be sacrificed, flayed, and her skin given to a man to wear while pretending to weave. Artisans would dance around the scene and then confess their sins to a statue of Xochiquetzal through bloodletting. She was also one of the goddesses impersonated during the Toxcatl festival, ritually married to a young man and kept in luxury for a year before being killed.

was that vision an alternative version of the luxury before the sacrifice? 

...or is it possible my vision predates the days of sacrifice?

i've learned to question the histories we're left with, if for no other reason than many weren't articulated until the various conquerors came.  there are centuries to know before that; centuries lost to dirt, water, air and other powers.

sometimes our soul-memories are the realest ones. even if they are the least-believed.

naming

{a follow up to this}

almost a year ago, i found out that i was born on st. joseph's day. thus, one of my names could very well have been josephine...well, if we were catholic and all.

i've always liked that name. especially its french pronunciation.

i also dig some of the variations: jayzl and zefina stand out.

today i sought out the meaning: god will increase.

might have to find a way to incorporate that somewhere...