denial

burning spear say,
door peep
shall not enter

you refused to move from the door jamb
taking advantage of my hospitality
waiting for an offer
of anything i seemed willing to give.

and i gave--
mainly out of love
sometimes out of loneliness and confusion
but i gave til it bled

til my children went hungry
til my mouth was too dry
to ask you to please return the favor
when you could.

those days i didn't see you,
you think i didn't know
you had somewhere to go?

a kitchen of your own, a bed to sleep in
when the demands of relationship-working
became too much;

when you couldn't seem to find the honey
my lips begged for,
and the hunger in my eyes terrified you
because it matched your own.

you are not my child,
so my lifeblood
cannot sustain you.

you can no longer
ride the coattails
of my asé.